In today’s Gospel passage, Jesus talks about a need for reconciliation.
“Therefore, if you bring your gift to the altar,
and there recall that your brother
has anything against you,
leave your gift there at the altar,
go first and be reconciled with your brother,
and then come and offer your gift.”
But what if my brother or sister aggrieved me greatly? What if what they did was unforgivable? And isn’t it a sign of weakness on my part for me to give in to them and forgive them?
I know that I always come back to a reminder of that for which we were made. I always seem to point out that we are made to become more and more conformed to Christ that we might be given union with the Trinity in the next. That we might be partakers in divinity. Today’s Prayer After Communion at Mass asks “that what we celebrate in sacramental signs…we may one day behold unveiled.”
Because we are called to union with God, we are also called to forgive like God. In the Our Father prayer, we pray, “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Peter was told by Jesus to forgive seventy-seven times. This was a number that a first century Jew would have understood to mean infinitely many times. This is how we are called to forgive.
For God, there is no unforgivable sin, there is only the sin for which forgiveness is not wanted by the sinner. If we are called to be like God, then the magnitude of the injustice does not relieve us of the obligation to forgive.
God is not a God of weakness. God is all-powerful, or omnipotent. Forgiveness is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of strength. When one forgives, they are forgiving the debt owed because of the injustice committed. Forgiveness is not holding on to resentment. It is showing strength over resentment (and over the injustice) by letting go and moving on with life. Forgiveness is not condoning the injustice. It is not forgetting about it. It is not pretending that it did not happen. It is not necessarily a restoration of trust or of the prior relationship. Prudence might dictate otherwise. It is being able to set aside the burden of resentment.
Forgiveness may not even benefit the one who committed the injustice. They might not know. They might not care. But it always benefits the one who suffered the injustice and who forgives.
Who, or what, have I refused to forgive in my life?